Ellee Seymour

So it took the News of the World to tell us why Boris is too busy to write his blog.

I would like to know if the whistle blower who dished the dirt also travelled on two wheels in hot pursuit of Boris, eyes firmly fixed to his or her watch.

How else were all his movements timed so precisely?

Men with beards and pale, interesting ladies are being sought by a film company to star in a blockbuster sequal to the Oscar-winning film Elizabeth.

Filming will take place on my doorstep and this weekend talent scouts were out recruiting extras. Between 400-500 are needed and they were not short of offers; more than 300 budding stars signed up in Ely alone.

My confidence was still on a high after my singing debut last week so I optimistically went along to their Ely recuiting venue to enrol. Two teenage sons, my husband and father-in-law followed suit. The process involved no more than having a mug shot taken and giving our vital statistics.

The film is entitled The Golden Age with some of the important shots for Elizabeth’s court to be filmed in the cloistered surroundings of Ely and Cambridge sometime in May. The star studded cast includes Cate Blanchett in the title role, Clive Owen as Sir Walter Raleigh and the immensley talented Geoffrey Rush as Sir Francis Walsingham.

Requirements for extras are that men should be bearded, with continental features an advantage as they could be chosen to play French or Spanish courtiers. Women with pale, interersting Elizabethan faces are also sought, the Enlish rose look. I’m afraid I think I might sit more comfortably in the continental court due to my half-Greek ancestory.

Grandad Roy has already experienced being an extra. Ely and King’s Lynn were all a flutter when Al Pacino arrived to star in Revolution in 1985, an unmitigated flop. The Goldcrest epic told the story of the American Revolution through the eyes of an illiterate trapper and his son who found themselves caught up in the fighting.

Well Roy was given a part to play in a crowd scene, he was instructed to wave his arm in the air - but forgot to remove his wrist watch first! His memory is of spending long, boring hours hanging about waiting, and the scene being repeatedly shot over and over again. That’s obviously why extras are advised to bring a book along, or even knitting, if selected.

My beautician friend Sue remembers taking a call during this time from Pacino’s PA who wanted to book him in for a massage. Thinking it was a friend playing a prank, she said: “F… off Celia, I know you are winding me up.”

She did get to rub massage oil over Pacino’s well toned body - and they both thoroughly enjoyed it.

I wonder if she will get a call from Geoffrey Rush…