How can kids suddenly learn respect if it is something they have ignored in the past? How can “respect zones” succeed when parents, schools and various agencies have failed?
The very word “respect” will turn kids off because to them it sounds too authoritarian, James’ story typifies the kind of challenge the government faces. And this is what Lisa, 18, says about the government’s latest plans, she hasn’t fallen for the gimmick:
“It’s about taking away part of freedom. The freedom to hang out and be respected and to be individuals.
“It is [Tony Blair’s] last year in office and he wants to go out with a bang. He wants to prove they can actually do something right for once.
“People don’t respect us. If they show respect for us we show respect. If they discriminate against us we are going to lose respect for them.”
Kids do need to feel their views are respected, that they are listened to, but they need to learn values too and have self-esteem. I believe they need support much earlier on in their lives, their guidance and role models come from their home environment and families, as well as schools. Many of them are leaving school barely educated, as Jade has demonstrated.
Our teenagers are among the most badly behaved in Europe, that’s the legacy of this government. It’s certainly not a badge of honour for Great Britain.
How would you solve this problem?
Alas, I fear our whole culture needs..er..renewal.
You discuss role models and the need for them close to home. Equally, look at the MSM last week.
Jade says vaguely racist comments and then aplogises; all papers and news programmes every day.
45 Commando marines in daring rescue attempt to save one of their own form the Taleban; minimal coverage, briefly mentioned in a few papers and on the BBC.
There ARE role models and plenty to in today’s world. Instead we choose not to see and to respect only luck and ignornace.
Curing this will be the beginning of the long road to improving ‘respect.’
Don`t agree CU.All this moaning about the tidal wave of filth takes everyones eye off the ball. The ball is housing policy and benefuts policy and the assault on the wroking class family . You should see whats going on on the local Andover estate . Scarcely a grown man living there and about 20% earning a living .
Solve that and the rest is easy
Newmania is right.
The first step has to be to reform the tax and benefits structure to encourage the married family and to discourage single parenthood as a career choice. How about refusing tenancies on social housingto the under-21s? That would discourage the have-a-baby to get a flat syndrome.
Also, introduce ‘show and tell’ in every primary school in Britain _ this teaches self-expression and articulacy in a structured and constructive way and people who can express themselves are much less likely to resort to midless anger and violece. Just look at the average American footballer compared with our own grunting, monosyllabic idiot _ I can’t believe the Yanks started out any brighter.
There are a hundred and one other things which could all make a difference.
Newmania and David, Your points are very relevant. I’m concerned too that these kids are basically unemployable which is why education should be the focus for them. I also feel instead of using the word “respect”, they should be introduced to the word “responsibility”. Being bored all day is another reason for living their lives the way they do. Who would want to give them a job without skills, including communication? I would like to see them involved in voluntary and community projects to broaden their outlook and make them less inward looking. They need projects that will give them self belief and self respect, to get them off the streets.
David, regarding “show and tell”, all this kind of stuff gets dropped at secondary school, but it does help boost their confidence at primary school. There is much less parental involvement in secondary education compared to primary school. But you can’t assume all parents want to take an active interest in their child’s education, it’s tough for the schools too.
Ellee, there are a couple of options, bring back the cane at school and reduce benefits to discourage the career option of becoming a teenage mum. They should not be allowed to jump council housing queues as it merely reinforces negative behaviour across generations
Snafu, I certainly don’t agree with your comment about the cane, and rising teenage pregnancies certainly need to be addressed, again it comes down to education.
Ellee, the liberal experiment in school discipline without chastisement has failed, tragically, it’s effects will be felt by this country for generations to come…
Ellee, whenever our high teenage pregancy rate hits the news, the usual suspects chorus about how we need ‘education’ to sort the problem _ please don’t join them!!! It is just an excuse NOT to tackle the root cause of the problem but instead to add more advisers/ consultants/ facilitators to Gordon’s public payroll. We do not need more education to sort that problem _ just lower benefits and no right to jump the queue for social housing. The bottom line is people sometimes need disincentives _ and, in this case, the best disincentive would be the widespread belief that, ‘If I get pregnant while unmarried and in my teens, I will be poor and miserable, have no fun at all and be looked down on by other people’.
I don’t think it’s the legacy of this governmernt alone, Ellee. I think it began with the rise of satire in the 60s [although I don’t think that was a bad thing it did mean that nothing was sacred any more] and I’m afraid I believe the Thatcher years did the most damage by recreating and emphasizing the divisions between rich and poor. I am also concerned about the role models our teenagers have, especially when there is no adult male in the family home.
I have to say that over a period of some 30 years teaching in HE, there has been an immense deterioration in so-called ‘respect’. During my first few years, in a lecture theatre will 100+ students you could hear a pin drop. These days it’s a constant fight against an under-current of background burbling and sending text-messages to each other in class.
I don’t know if there are any easy answers (I guess they would have been found by now if there were) but (as someone said above) employment prospects could be a key. There may be no incentive for a young person to be respectful and studious if there is no real prospects or ambition.
I know it is pointless to hark back to the ‘good old days’ but when I was 11, the most critical thing in my life was to make it into my Grammar School. I think that sort of thing is way down a child’s agenda these days.
I think the Prime Minister got it right when he asserted “Education, education, education. The problem is making it effective, IMO.
Well said David we have had years and years of hand wringing and ,”something must be done!”.
Education has been hosed with resources and it makes no difference. Come and have a walk around Andover Estate Ellee and then see how much difference you think a better school would make. We are in crisis and there is a reality gap that only the political class ignore.
Its a selling sweetener but real policy is not , in my humble opinion, ( just remembered) at this level.
BTW – I gather you are on Doughty Street were you not going to alert your many adoring fans ? I am told its an all girl evening which is that right ?I will do my best to pick it up . Don`t be nervous you kmnow how sweet and kind bloggers are
( yuk yuk
Ellee, for some teenagers with no real career prospects in life, having a baby is the best career option!
By the way Ellee in Islington 50 % of the housing is Council ( of various sorts) which is about 65%of the population( 120,000) of that number 70% are on benefits of some kind. Eight languages or more are spoken in most of the schools and if you think the overall unemployable rate is bad you should see what it look like for white working-class boys only. We had a little reported riot last year when the police turned up and there was no retreat.
David is incredibly important in Haringey Tories where much the same factors apply .
Perhaps we get a little impatient with all the social problems of the being tucked out of sight in London while the shires complain about the 3% Social housing barrier. What is happening is exactly what Frank Field predicted before he was Mugged by that mouth breathing fraud Gordon Brown . It has nothing to do with teaching respect or anything else. Those who listen don`t need the help.
One appreciates of course , your intentions but presentational initiatives can act as a political panacea allowing everyone to avoid the difficult problems . They have done so for ten years
Hi Newmania, Yes, I am on Doughty Street tonight. Being stuck out in Cambridgeshire, I rely on the kindness of the gods to ensure there will be no adverse weather conditions or leaves on the line to disrupt my plans. I’ve just been to the station to check and all is expected to be ok. I am now dashing out now on the school run and have meals to fix before I set off, so no time for a post.
Thanks for your insightful comments.
Inciteful usually
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Respect is a battered word here, with people like Jade and Cherie Blair around.
Go back 20 years and teach properly again.
I will be truthful and honest up front, I don’t know how to solve the current problems! However, I feel fairly certain that giving £6m. each to 40 councils to set up an uber-chav zone is not going to produce the results that the great majority in society would like. I think the vast number of us would prefer to see this £240m. spent on additional manpower for police forces up and down the country.
We would rather see some more hardened criminals removed from our midst than see tax payer’s cash used to set up parenting classes or handing out further Asbo’s for teenagers to breech or wear like a badge of pride. Then there is the rather feckless idea of evicting some people from their housing in some of the worst estates this country has to offer – evict them where to? (Somewhere else to make someone else’s life a misery no doubt.)
Crikey, you’ll be telling me to go and get your own blog next!
nice to see you on the Doughty tonight. Well Done.
Education: self respect, discipline, responsibility and accountability for ones own actions, respect for elders, competitiveness, merit, reward and recognition, duty to those less fortunate and a sense of community. Our schools have become limp-wristed outlets for the great relativist experiment, but they are the only institutions left that can inculcate these things on behalf of the whole community. Scouts, Church, Cadets, etc and other voluntary groups have been in decline. Schools have lost their authority and their moral mandate to raise moral young people. Dysfunctional parents need help but the problem lies in how we treat young people in their peer groups growing up.
National Service may be a bit draconian at the tail end but if the government is extending the leaving age to 18, why not build in some kind of team-based community work for all kids in these final 2 years?
At the risk of sounding old-school Tory, it has to be about the parents.
If the parents get it right, the kids will follow. And their kids too…
I agree with you. Kids need to be taught about values much earlier in their lives. I think between the age of 7 and 13 we can mould them into good human beings by imparting the values of respect, self esteem and all…
Once they are in teens they need respect and attention. We shd give them alll the attnetion and should respect their thoughts…
You are righ, they learn a lot from the homes. So, it’s our duty to create a right atmosphere at homes, if we want them to grow up as a responsible adults.
Raj, 7 seems too old! Labour are currently looking at identifying ‘problem children’ at nursery school!
I have no problems in my area with respect. I treat young people with respect, and they do likewise. So even if other people find them difficult I don’t. It works.
You are right Snafu… may be 7 is bit old. But if we start teaching them values, respect, self esteem all these things at nursery itself, I feel it’s like taking away their childhood innocense.
Raj, these values should be taught by example so it comes to them naturally, I agree it is important they enjoy their childhood.